Another rollercoaster of a week has been and gone, and I'm still none the wiser as to how I feel about it all.
Some days are fabulous, most days to be fair, and I'm thinking to myself how blessed I am to have this time with my husband and our little girl. Nel's a lucky wee thing. She had just enrolled at nursery, and we were in the midst of seeing if there was enough space for her to attend for a few more days a week, after having spent most of her short life so far, constantly with me. However, since Covid-19 forced the closure of nurseries, she's come back into the fold. And she is absolutely loving it. She's a sociable little thing, however, also has quite a temper and often just likes hanging out with just us, or her grandparents, and not having to put up with other toddlers' crap. When this is all over, she will be going back, as much as I love having her, she needs to learn to share and also to be able to play with paints and mud when not in my house. God I miss my cleaner.
Anyway, the fabulous days are fabulous, but then other days just seem to drag. I sometimes feels so lethargic and tired, and at a total loss as to what to do to keep Nel entertained. Those days she just ends up watching a lot of television, which I absolutely hate myself for.
I'm trying not to beat myself up about it though, I can see that nearly every person in the world experiencing lockdown is struggling some days with coping, so this is totally normal. And she is getting out and she is showered with love, hugs and kisses daily from both myself and Sam, whereas a lot of kids out there aren't, so I can't be sad for her.
The weather's been getting warmer which has been great, however, making the staying off the booze til the weekend idea, a bit harder. Yesterday afternoon ended in multiple gin and tonics in the garden, as you can imagine.
The weekend just gone was Easter weekend, which was very, very cute. Now we're not religious folk, but obviously when you have children, and an event appears in the diary which presents you with an excuse for a different form of entertainment, then by-Jesus of course we shall acknowledge it. Easter provided us with 4 days worth of "find the plastic eggs in the garden, whilst mum and dad sit and drink wine", which really was a fabulous game, one that Sam and I thoroughly enjoyed. We did this on Good Friday, Saturday, Easter Sunday and then again on Easter Monday. Lovely! We also used it an an excuse to be wonderfully gluttonous, and I cooked up a massive leg of lamb from our local butchers, along with all the trimmings. We then proceeded to get gloriously drunk again after Nel had gone to bed, so really it was perfect....exactly what Jesus would have wanted.